


Donors

by Milady_Kora



Series: FE Trans Week 2020 [6]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Urban Fantasy, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Asshole medical personnel, Blood Donation, Established Relationship, Homomisic Language, Homophobic Language, Hospitals, M/M, Trans Male Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Trans Male Sylvain Jose Gautier, Transmisic Language, transphobic language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 06:20:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25429798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Milady_Kora/pseuds/Milady_Kora
Summary: "A glance over to the registration desk and he can see that Sylvain is more nervous than he himself probably notices. He constantly shifts his position on the chair, fingers toying with his hairstyle as he answers the questions Felix only hears snippets of. The yellow-haired secretary (not blonde - actually yellow, weirdly enough) seems a bit annoyed, but hands Sylvain all the necessary forms and fastens a band with a barcode around Sylvain's wrist. Finally, Sylvain comes back over and flops into the chair next to Felix."In a Modern AU with slight Urban Fantasy, Sylvain accepts that his blood is able to save many lifes and decides to donate blood. Felix comes with him as moral support - as it turns out, that support will be very much necessary.
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier
Series: FE Trans Week 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1833865
Comments: 4
Kudos: 42
Collections: Fire Emblem Trans Week 2020!





	Donors

**Author's Note:**

> Given that it's #FETransWeek, I want to use each day to highlight a different organisation working with and for trans people. Please check out the [International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association](https://ilga.org/)!
> 
> Content warnings in the tags, please tell me if I missed any! (And it goes without saying that some of the views expressed in this chapter in no way reflect my own.)

"Please go to the waiting room. Once the registration desk is free, they'll call you up", the nurse says, barely looking up at them, and Felix and Sylvain oblige. The waiting room seems completely normal on first glance, even the lack of an obvious source of light doesn’t seem out of place in a hospital. The windows in the waiting room offer a beautiful third-floor view over a sunlit garden. The only problem with that is that the hospital is on the first floor, it’s early in the morning and there is no garden anywhere near the hospital.

Sylvain tries not to focus on everything weird about where they are and instead focuses on how, for once, they're holding hands in public – when they got out of the car, Sylvain was so tense that Felix actually offered, and Sylvain instantly took him up on that. It's not that he's afraid of hospitals or doctors. Goddess knows he was the first one to joke about the nurses who'd take care of him, but in truth, he is feeling very uneasy about donating blood. He doesn't like to think about how valuable his crest is.

Well, there's no helping it now. Sylvain gently (not gently at all, actually) squeezes Felix's hand and they go in.

Still, donating blood had been Sylvain's idea. Felix had been donating regularly for years now and Sylvain had always picked him up with the car afterwards, even before they started dating. Felix was a very special kind of prickly before the appointments and a very special kind of soft afterwards - truly, the meanness was in his blood, Sylvain always joked, and Felix was too dazed to argue (which, of course, only proved his point).

Interestingly enough, Felix had never pressed the issue of why Sylvain never joined him for the donation before. Although considering the wonderful incident of how his parents had pressured him into becoming an organ donor for Miklan who had ruined his own body, it's not difficult to hazard a guess.

All in all, not a pleasant way to grow up.

Felix gently moves his thumb over their intertwined fingers, and Sylvain is once more amazed at how easily he can pull him back into the present moment.

"You good?", Felix asks, and Sylvain nods.

"Yeah. Just got a lot on my mind."

Felix snorts and murmurs "That'd be a first", but the gentleness in his touch remains when he locks eyes with Sylvain. "You really don't have to, you know. I won't laugh at you if you decide to turn back."

Sylvain snorts, too. "That would definitely be a first."

When Felix is about to open his mouth in protest, Sylvain shakes his head and sighs.

"Sorry. No, I want to do this. I know I can help and they're always looking for donors who have a crest, so I might as well do a good thing in my life for once. I know I don’t have to, but… my blood could save so many people."

He's called up to the registration desk, so he just presses a quick kiss onto Felix's forehead. "I'll be right back."

Felix isn't donating today. He was here last month and still needs to wait several weeks before he can donate again, but he figured he could keep Sylvain company. They've been dating for over a year now, and he's still surprised at how easily he just admitted to himself that he's worried. Felix isn't always sure that it's a good thing to be so attached and vulnerable, but aside from a few fights, Sylvain had never made him regret it.

A glance over to the registration desk and he can see that Sylvain is more nervous than he himself probably notices. He constantly shifts his position on the chair, fingers toying with his hairstyle as he answers the questions Felix only hears snippets of. The yellow-haired secretary (not blonde - actually yellow, weirdly enough) seems a bit annoyed, but hands Sylvain all the necessary forms and fastens a band with a barcode around Sylvain's wrist. Finally, Sylvain comes back over and flops into the chair next to Felix.

"Look at this pretty cattle mark I got. And the forms - so much paperwork for what, half a litre?", Sylvain says. "Did you tell me I need to bring a pen, or can I blame not having one on you?"

Wordlessly, Felix hands him the ballpoint pen he always keeps in his pocket. Sylvain laughs (the automatic kind he always uses whenever he doesn’t feel safe) and takes it, before getting on Felix’s nerves when he keeps on clicking it as he reads the questions.

"Have I been in Gloucester between the Red Wolf Moon of year 1966 and the Ethereal Moon of 1970? Felix, be honest", he says, dramatically clutching his chest, "do I really look that old?"

Felix rolls his eyes and lightly punches Sylvain's arm. "No, you don't. Now get on with it."

Sylvain laughs (the happy, genuine kind this time) and keeps answering the questions, turning to the second page. The questions there stop him.

_For women:_  
_Are you currently pregnant or nursing?_  
_Have you ever been pregnant (including aborted pregnancies and miscarriages)?_  
_Have you, in the last 12 months, had sex with a bisexual man?_

_For men:_  
_Have you ever had sex with another man?_  
_Have you had sex with a homosexual or bisexual man in the past 12 months?  
_

Sylvain swallows before smiling widely.

"Hey, Felix?", he asks, his voice as light as possible, "what did you write as your answer for questions..." he looks at the form again, "…19 to 23?"

"This isn't an exam, Sylvain." Felix looks at the form, too, before frowning. "But I lied on those questions."

And here's the thing. Sylvain hates lying. That is actually true, just as it’s also true that he has a lot of experience with lying.

Sylvain clicks the ballpoint pen a few more times, then skips the questions and answers the rest - the vaccinations he had as a kid (all of them), whether he was sick in the past few weeks (he wasn't), whether he had ever had surgery (he had), whether he consents to a part of his donation being used for research (he doesn't).

Then, he flips back to page 2 and stares at questions 19, 20, 21, 22 and 23 before hesitantly making a few crosses on the paper and getting up, not letting Felix see what his answers were. Felix doesn't know if that was on purpose or not, but that doesn't stop him from getting up, too, and walking back to the registration desk with Sylvain.

Clearing his throat, Sylvain hands the forms back to the secretary before putting his other arm around Felix and-

"Excuse me", Felix hisses, "would you mind not grabbing my ass while we're in public?"

Sylvain grins. "I'm just putting your pen back into your pocket, baby." His fingers feel for the back pocket of Felix's jeans, definitely lingering longer than they have to, before slipping the pen inside. The secretary is still reading through the forms, so Sylvain uses the time to tug at Felix's ponytail, chuckling when Felix slaps his hand.

Hm. At least he seems to be a better mood now, Felix thinks with a huff.

Then, the secretary looks up at them through slit pupils, and instantly, Sylvain feels that something is wrong. Very wrong, in fact.

"Is that your..?", the secretary asks, and Sylvain nods slowly.

"In that case, I'm sorry, but I'm afraid we cannot accept your donation."

"Excuse me?" Something inside Felix’s stomach drops and then rises back up, the bile turning into cold anger. In an instant, he’s at the desk, snarling at the secretary. "Would you like to say that again?"

His words don't strike as much a reaction as they should, in his opinion, because the secretary just raises their eyebrows. "We are in a hospital. If you cannot be quiet, we must ask you to leave."

That does nothing to calm Felix down, because how dare they? How dare they treat Sylvain like this?

Then, Sylvain places his hand on Felix's shoulder, and of course he should have known that Sylvain would just allow people to discard him again like he's some sort of-

"It's okay, baby. I'll handle this", Sylvain murmurs, and Felix has to summon all his self-control to not snap at Sylvain, either.

Sylvain just smiles sadly at Felix, then takes a deep breath and gives the secretary his polite proper public smile.

"Sorry. Do you think you could explain to us why exactly this is a problem?"

The secretary looks at the clock on their levitating computer screen, then shrugs. "I don't make the rules. We're legally not allowed to accept donations from anyone who has had intercourse with someone... Well. The risk is too high."

Each of the words are a slap in the face to Sylvain. Especially those the secretary left unsaid.

"The risk of what?", he asks, and Felix grits his teeth.

"Look", the secretary says, "you know better than me what exactly you do in bed, but illnesses are serious and I'm afraid you belong to a high-risk group."

Sylvain sighs and gently places his hand on top of Felix's, allowing him to pull back if he wants. Felix doesn't, despite his anger. He knows this is anything but Sylvain's fault. He knows it too well. So when he notices Sylvain swallow, gathering strength inside, he doesn't stop him. It's Sylvain's decision, he tells himself, and Felix just hopes that Sylvain isn't doing this as part of his usual self-inflicted punishment - especially since he had gotten much better with therapy and medication and everything.

The same thoughts cross Sylvain's mind, and he hopes it, too, when he opens his mouth and blurts out: "I'm trans. Am I still part of the high-risk group?"

The secretary takes a moment to type something on their floating computer (never a good sign, Sylvain notes), looks at the forms again, and says "Then I'm afraid you've answered the wrong questions", before turning to Felix and asking him if he is "a bisexual".

Felix takes a deep breath and then grits out through his teeth that he's gay. The secretary just hums in response before giving the forms back go Sylvain, together with a pen and the request to answer questions 19-21 and cross out his answers to questions 22 and 23.

At that point, Felix is so furious that he's close to crying. He hates that kind of anger, he hates the hospital they're in, he hates the secretary and everything and everyone around him, and if it wasn't for Sylvain and his stupid complexes, he'd have left long ago already. Felix thinks of the technique Ingrid taught him long ago and pictures a feather floating in front of him, breathing steadily to keep it afloat. He barely registers that Sylvain walks him back to a chair and sits him down, gently rubbing his shoulders.

Felix leans into Sylvain's touch automatically without even thinking, leaning the crown of his head against Sylvain's stomach, so after a while, he feels steady enough notice the wetness on his cheeks and hastily wipes the tears away.

"Sorry", he mutters.

Sylvain just smiles gently. "Do you want to go?"

And when Felix opens his mouth in protest, because it was Sylvain who wanted to donate blood, because this isn't about him, Sylvain lightly kisses his forehead and whispers "I promise I won't make fun of you if you do."

That makes Felix laugh through his breath. But still. "What about you?"

"What do you think, Fe?" Sylvain's voice is calm and relaxed and for the first time since they entered this hospital, it's honest. "I'll follow you. Wouldn't be the first time I did, right?"

It really wouldn't, and Felix thinks that he's grateful for that.

"Those bastards don't deserve a drop of your blood, you know that?", he says.

Judging by the look on his face, Sylvain doesn't. He does smile again, though, so Felix counts that as a win. And then Sylvain pinches Felix's cheek and well, he takes that back. Clearly not a win anymore.

"Come on", Sylvain says, taking a backwards step towards the exit and tugging on Felix's hand. "Let's go."

As they leave, Sylvain's hand around Felix's shoulders, Felix can't resist the temptation to turn around one last time and flip off the secretary.

Fuck that hospital.

**Author's Note:**

> Later, Dimitri tries to convince Felix and Ingrid that spraying a "FUCK YOU" graffiti on the hospital wall is a bad idea, and fails when Ingrid suggests they use cursive writing for the graffiti.
> 
> Thank you for reading this thing! If you have any suggestions what I could use the free day tomorrow for, you can find me on Twitter at [@MiladyKora](https://twitter.com/MiladyKora). I'd be happy to hear your thoughts!


End file.
